I’ve prayed for something for a decade that hasn’t yet come to pass. There are months where the sting of waiting wanes. But there are those where it doesn’t, where the seeming interminability of the situation – and God’s silence – threatens to overwhelm me.
I’m guessing I’m not alone in feeling the Lord’s silence gnaw at me at times. You can probably recall moments in your life when you felt the same way or you might be in a season of silence right now.
God has been gracious and has lifted me from the swamp of my negative emotions more times than I want to admit on a public website. However, I have begun to see that regardless of our circumstances, the Lord is never silent. He might not give us immediate direction or answer the prayer how or when we’d like, but he does care about the pain.
This series on What to do When God Seems Silent aims to help us work through the emotions that come with experiencing silence by helping us draw nearer to the Lord in all circumstances.
The first step when God seems silent: be honest.
God wants us to tell him how we feel. Whatever we are feeling – rejected, angry, hurt, grieved – he can take it. Our feelings will not be a surprise. He knows them anyway.
You might be thinking – as am I – that voicing our feelings is futile when God knows them already. But prayer is never about giving God new information – it’s about inviting him into a discussion.
A relationship with God is what sustains us through suffering. Because of this, when we choose not to turn to the Lord in trials, we magnify our pain. We can be angry with God, but must be wary of hardening ourselves into responding with silence to what is silence in appearance only. Instead, we should turn to the Lord with all of ourselves – especially negative emotions that we don’t want anyone to know about. We see this in the Bible in many places.
The Bible contains many brutally honest prayers.
We see people who are devoted to the Lord expressing their emotions to him in many Biblical passages.
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning? O my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer, and by night, but I find no rest.
Do you know who is speaking these words?
It’s Psalm 22 (ESV), written by King David – the man after God’s own heart (1 Samuel 13:14). King David knew God deeply, but at some points in his life, he felt like the Lord had forsaken him. However, he did not cut off communication – instead, he told God how he felt.
Let’s consider Habakkuk, a minor prophet in the Old Testament.
“O Yahweh, how long shall I cry for help, and you will not hear? Or cry to you ‘Violence!’ and you will not save?”
Habakkuk 1:2 ESV
Job from the ancient land of Ur is another example.
“Oh, that I had one to hear me! Here is my signature! Let the Almighty answer me! Oh, that I had the indictment written by my adversary!”
Job 31:35 ESV
Even John the Baptist, the “greatest man ever born of women” (Matthew 11:11) struggled. When he is in prison, he sends this question to Jesus:
“Are you the one who is to come, or shall we look for another?”
Matthew 11:3 ESV
Job, David, Habakkuk, and John were honest about their questions and feelings. They allowed themselves to be desperate before God. (Job is later confronted by God, but not in response to this prayer.) Voicing their emotions – being honest with God – was the first step in finding relief.
We learn two things from these prayers. The first is that experiencing negative emotions is not a sin; the second is that what we do with those emotions matters.
Experiencing negative emotions is not a sin.
It is such a relief to me that these men experienced some of the same feelings I have had. They knew God deeply and were seeking him, but that did not mean that they did not have questions about pain.
Their prayers show us that feeling like the Lord is silent is not a sin in itself – it is not indicative that our relationship with the Lord is specious. This was King David, the man after God’s own heart! John, the greatest man born of women, questioned Jesus’s identity! If they had these feelings, of course we will as well.
What we do with those emotions matters.
We can learn from these four examples what we should do with our emotions. We don’t bottle them, hide them, or dump them on other people. Instead, as they did, we must give them to the Lord. We turn to the Lord because we believe that he will hear us.
Indeed, Job, David, Habakkuk, and John went to God not in spite of their pain, but because of it. If they did not believe that God would hear them, they would not have asked him, “Why won’t you hear?” There is no point in talking to a God who won’t hear them – so they must have believed that he would.
In this way, asking God why won’t you hear? is a way of acknowledging the answer at the same time because by being addressed to God, the question itself assumes that He is listening. Being honest with God in prayer, then, is a proclamation of faith. It’s saying, I feel this way, Lord, and I believe you can do something about it.
When God seems silent, bare your heart before him.
Even though Job’s entire life was in ruins, David was mocked and scorned, Habakkuk saw the coming destruction of Judah, and John was awaiting his execution, these four knew that their salvation remained in the hands of the Lord. Even though they felt like he was silent, they turned to God – even if only to ask him a question about his identity.
When we are walking through a time of silence, the first step that we should take is the one that they have modeled for us: be honest with the Lord. Let us bare our hearts before him, even when our hearts are filled with questions and distress about what seems like the silence of God. As David writes in Psalm 62:
“For God alone my soul waits in silence;
from him comes my salvation.[…]
Trust in him at all times, O people;
Psalm 62: 1 & 8 ESV
pour out your heart before him;
God is a refuge for us.
Whatever you are facing, bring it to the Lord. Speak to him, be honest before him. Trust that he hears you, take refuge in his faithfulness, and know that behind every heavy silence is a mighty God who loves you.
About the Author
© Olivia Davis 2020, all rights reserved
Sharon says
I need to know the nearest of his presence I need to know that God hears me, I need a sign from, Theres so much im grateful to God for, I believe being alive on its own is a huge sign that he is with but then again how do I enjoy the same life when I am constantly in need praying for the same thing over and over asking God to end my financial problems so I may live freely and have enough to give and share, This particular prayer is taking long and sometimes I ask myself if perhaps its too big for him, Im failing tp understand why every opportunity I get is not complete theres always something that takes away my joy, God knows how pure my heart is, he knows hpw generous I am and the good intentions behind everything I ask him but right now Im questioning why he doesnt answer me on this specific request, I am tired of borrowing every month, I suffer from anxiety and heart palpitations… at times when I question him I feel guilty or feel lile im being disrespectful to him…..I need him so much, I dont want to think theres another, being in Africa I dont want to opt to go look for solutions and answers elsewhere…..I need desperately God to answer me
Marie says
Golly gosh where do I start? Suppporting financially, emotionally, physically to husband’s parents suffering from a major stroke and 3rd stage of dementia. My dad who is a widow and both of us in our fifties, no jobs seeking to no avail. Huge mortgage to service, medical bills, household etc. Suffering from burn out, anxieties, panic attacks and what have you associated with these challenges. Sometimes optimistic until nect rejection or bill comes then spiral downwards again… Have pawn jewellery, sold stuff and whatever that can be sold, already done so… Reserves depleting and trying to still praise God for His silence… Sounds a bit hollow and feel like a fake Christian with all the hallelujahs…
Praying for reprieve and have to confess, felt like Elijah to just have God take me life as I am too coward to do so myself…
Kenneth Gray says
Hello,
God is always silent. Not just a season but life long silence from God. I am 54 and have never heard from God. I keep running into people telling me that God does talk to us. Well after 54 years of nothing but silence, absence, and unanswered prayers from God has shown that God refuses to be involved in my life, in any actual way. To me the Bible, though being God’s Word, is completely silent, as inanimate objects tend to be. I have never heard God’s voice in the Bible. Told God speaks through nature. I have never heard a voice from a tree, a rock, or animal, for that matter. God gave us free will, which He won’t interfere with. That said, people choose to preach God’s word. God doesn’t force them to do anything. That means that God can’t talk through other people without violating free will. So I don’t believe God communicates that way. I have lived in poverty for my whole life, thus I have no money to do God’s work or even go to church. If God communicates that way then I can’t hear Him as I can’t go there. That leaves only God’s audible voice, and God never speaks to me. I need God/Jesus to get actually involved in my life. But alas they both are absent. So from my point of view God is always silent.
Thanks and God bless you, in Jesus holy name, Amen.
Jenny says
Thank you. I needed this today.
Sunday says
In my own situation….in fact I don’t know what is the mind of God, I was born in suffering, growing in suffering! Although I have been praying to God all the way, but know answer. I could could in my life recall 3 times that I heard something thing like the voice of God, but know am doubting it_maybe that’s a take voice.
the first one (1) some one called my name inside dream and ask me not to give up that i should continue forward.
The second one (2) was also in the dream; I was chatting with someone on Facebook in that dream: the person told me that my prayers has been answered.
The third one (3) I was in Dream my phone rang and I answered the call, the person told me that God says that he should tell me that my name has been writing in the book of Life, with a lot of good things the person said Wich I I forgot when I woke up.
Why am doubting this voice is because after hearing all this it’s seems as if that’s when my hardship starts. Everything got worst, up till now am going homeless no job can’t even afford to eat, now suicide is knocking at my door. Because i can’t be alive and die of hunger and shame. And I have promised myself that I will never do bad thing to get money, so I rather quite my life and let everything go.
Olivia Davis says
Sunday, I am so sorry that you are going through such a difficult time. I am praying for you and asking the Lord to cover you in His love and kindness in this terribly hard moment. You are loved by God, and you are seen–and even if God seems silent, He is not. He is nearer to you than you know, and he knows what it is to walk through such challenging circumstances. Psalm 34:15, “The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are attentive to their cry…”
If you are considering suicide, I urge you to call 911 to seek immediate help. If you are located in the US, you may also call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1 (800) 273-8255. If you live outside of the US, here are international suicide helplines: suicidestop.com/call_a_hotline.
I am praying for you!
Ibrahim J. Juliana says
Hello, I just read your comment from the message by Olivia Davis. I want to say, you are not in this all by yourself. God is with you. The enemy wants to destroy your life because he sees a greater glory in you.
Please be encouraged, those that wait on the Lord, He shall renew their strength. He rewards those who diligently seek Him.
Why not hold on, keep your hope alive, that you may encourage someone tomorrow whose hopes are ruined. God will make you laugh again. Remember the story of Job, God later restored all that he lost and blessed him abundantly.
Don’t give up on God.
Anonymous says
For the past 2 and a half years I’ve been asking and praying to the Lord for something and silence is what I’ve got…ive been unsuccessful as I’m looking for a job and June this year, something else happened to me . I’m currently at the stage where I’m done praying to the Lord for anything cos ppl I know they are flourishing and getting what they want or need and being happy and all I’m getting is silence. I drew closer to the Lord after what happened in June but I’m unhappy cos everyday is a struggle for me just to b happy and still feel that the Lord really cares about me…He definitely cares and love others but what I feel and experienced, I dont think He even knows that I exist. I will b honest, I am angry with the Lord, He knows what I’m going through but yet He passes me by and open doors for ppl I know and leave my doors shut.
I know that the fact that I wake up every morning is a blessing but i would rather die than b so unhappy. It feels good letting this all out.
Smol faithful bean says
Hi, I don’t know how long ago this was or if you will ever see this. Or perhaps your in a better place today. But I just wanted to say never take your eyes off the Lord. He is in the subtlest of places. I know how angry and how disappointed feeling unheard from God can feel. I’ve felt unheard for over a year. But I can say that I don’t give up on God. He gave me life and knows exactly what He wants for me. Look deeply at your situation and see what kinds of lessons you have learned. Sometimes pain and waiting are lessons and we can take those with us through life. Amen. Good luck.
Anonymous says
I have been unhappy and worried for the past 2 and a half years and thicos of things that have happened
Theodora says
I have been praying to God about something for over 3 years. I am awaiting breakthrough about this situation.
I feel somewhat agitated at times. Sometimes I stop praying about it as I think this might help me forget and move on. But the agitation returns and when I pray I receive peace and warmth in my heart so I am assuming I am to carry on praying. This is about a man I have liked- we are in separate places which may be for the best. I can see why God has drawn me to him- as I have prayed for him and seen real changes. I strongly believe God is completing something and he wants me to continue praying. Yet I need Him to make a way in Jesus- as at times I get a bit depressed. I pray the Lord will give me my hearts desire as I delight in Him- I struggle with anxiety and work etc, and I want to obey Him fully just to obey Him in any case. Sometimes I worry if I confuse faith and imagination- I do not want to be led by imagination and get hurt. What I do know is I have peace when I pray for this man. Pray for me please. Even when the Lord makes a way for me I can run away and get nervous- pray that I will be ready to receive.
I thank God that I have peace in Jesus- which is the peace the world cannot give- how can the world understand this peace that surpasses all understanding. Whether he fulfills this desire or not I do realise that love for and from another is only a shadow of the love of Jesus and I want to honour God for this- may we never forget the gift of Eternal life that we have been given.
Kyle Clem says
Hi, Im not sure if you will ever see this comment but I am in a very similar situation, from the opposite side I am a young man that fell deeply for my high school girlfriend. We dated for 5 years and 2 of them were long distance when she moved away to college. I didn’t understand how to grow up or become a provider and it seems like I never got an opportunity to show her the best of me but there’s no doubt I made a choice to love her and I wont change my mind about that. It’s been close to a year now and I’m still asking God for closure and not really attempting to move on but its kind of a “It is what it Is” situation.
R says
Hi Theodora,
I can’t believe what I just read because I’m in the exact situation my self. I hope and pray God has given you an answer by now. Keep believing in Him and grow strong in faith, if He still hasn’t. God will make a way when there seems to be no way
Smol Faithful Bean says
I am in this situation also it’s been 3.5 years. I still feel God showing me signs to not give up. So I pray about it sometimes. If it is Gods will it will be. If not, God has something better.
Vivian Virgil says
I can’t complain, but I’m a woman who has worked faithfully 20 yrs for a physician, due to covid my hrs were cut so I decided to turn in my notice and chose faith for something else more stable, I stepped out in faith and Nothing, no job no insurance I do have a spouse that works but I hate seeing him do everything alone. We don’t have the best marriage so it’s scary, I thought my faith would get ne through but I’m holding on to God’s timing not mine. Please pray I can get employment soon been 7months.
R says
Hi Theodora,
I can’t believe what I just read because I’m in the exact situation my self. I hope and pray God has given you an answer by now. Keep believing in Him and grow strong in faith, if He still hasn’t. God will make a way when there seems to be no way.
Gordon says
I question not whether God is silent, but whether he speaks at all. If the canon is closed, then God hasn’t said anything to anyone at all other than repeating himself for over 1,930 years. If scripture has all authority, then even the Holy Spirit submits to it. And since we have thousands of denominations, each interpreting scripture in its own way, how can we conclude anything but that the HS is no longer here to even interperet it for us?
The gifts of prophesy, healing and interpreting tongues died a long time ago; who says the gift of knowledge isn’t gone, too?
Anonymous says
It’s yourspiritual numbness that’s abut down ,not God. He is still on the throne. He changes not. When ever we are doubting the issue is with us not God. What to do ? Repent, help my unbelief, please God. Thank you for Thy help. Amen
Brian Rudolph says
For me, God doesn’t ‘seem’ silent, he is silent, period. I’ve prayed and prayed and have not once heard his voice in any sort of matter. So when people tell me they hear his voice, I don’t believe it. I think they are disillusioned. Or maybe I should try some of what they’re been smoking.
Anonymous says
For me, the voice of God is that inner voice that is sharing the right things with me, not to be confused with other inner voices sharing wrongful things.
Pamela Sandifer says
you saying you don’t hear God probably because you’re want to hear what you want too and not Him. It’s not about us, it’s about God
Selene says
I have been through countless times of suffering and I could not hear God’s voice, no matter how long or how fervently I prayed. I feel very lonely…I also had several very disturbing or strange dreams, including one vague dream of death and one dream where I was praised in front of people after doing well in a test, though I did not do well in my tests. Please help me. Thank you very much for your kind attention.
Julia says
I am just like those who has left a comment. I have been in this silenced season with God too. I truly believe through the pain and suffering. God is working it out for my good. Sometime it not easy to talk to God and get no response. I don’t mind waiting on the Lord. I know He’s going to come after while.
Karin says
I lost my job after 31 years. I loved my job so much but had issues with management that never could be resolved. Since my housing is tied to my housing I now have to leave and at 72 that isn’t easy. I don’t have family to help. I have prayed everyday for direction but God remains silent. I have no idea where to go. I also have pets I have to think of.
Edward Roy says
Thank you Olivia. God bless you.
John says
Thank you for this article. I’m also going through the moment of silence from God and have been wondering why. Being a Christian myself, I often wondered why God would be silent and wish He’d answer and at least give me some signs or whisper, “I’m here with you” to assure me that i’m not alone. Anyways, I recently lost my job due to COVID-19 and being the head of the family and father to 2 young little girls (2 and 7 year) it’s been a challenge. Even more so with the financial responsibilities that we currently have. I’m worried that I might loose all after because I don’t really know where to go from here. My wife and I are now in our late 40’s and having worked for 7 and more years for a company that we thought was stable and all of a sudden it’s gone due to the pandemic is very tough to swallow. With my wife currently taking the fort as the provider for the family and I being full-time with the kids, and starting a small business it’s been a challenge and been trying to find guidance as to whether or not this is the route God wants for me to take. Anyways, I just wanted to say thank you for this. Sometimes I just wanna shout it out to God…and ask Why, Where to go, what to do, but silence is all I hear. But I know He is here, and I bet He can read this as I write. My request is for someone to just pray for me and my family and for anyone out there who is also going through same in this difficult times we are facing and hope God will somehow give us the strength to endure. Thank you. God bless to all.
Olivia Davis says
Hi, John. Thank you so much for your comment. Your situation grieves me; that sounds incredibly difficult. I have prayed for your new business to proper, for the Lord to provide abundantly, and for you to feel his care for you. I will also bring your request for prayer to a ministry that I’m involved in and we will pray over this again. Many blessings, John, and thank you again for your comment.
Amy says
Olivia, Please pray for my family as well. I am a single mom of 7, 6 with me. Currently no job or home and no direction from God. I am praying for a miracle in all those areas especially before Christmas! God where are you? What is your plan? This is one of those tough tests of faith. Asking for prayer for our needs and God would bless us indeed! Thank you.
Olivia Davis says
Amy, thank you for your message, and absolutely, I will pray. May you feel the nearness of the Lord. I am asking him to move on your behalf and bring you comfort. Many blessings. – Olivia.
Jimmie Marshall says
I thought I was the only one dealing with this “God silence” Just reading your story John has kinda given me a “sense of hope” yet I don’t get why all this is happening to me #1 I’m a man who believes in God #2 I am considered a good person by friends #3 I read my Bible,study & pray yet I get no answers from the Lord I’m 57 yrs old not working now due to physical issues & covid pandemic just lost my place to stay my family wont offer me any assistance resident, monetary or otherwise my mother acts like she hates me and I don’t know where to turn saddened in Tampa.
April. says
Hearing God is not audible. You hear God through His holy word. You hear God sometimes through the small still voice when you are silent. Sometimes you hear him through a dear Christian brother or sister. Once I was at a womens conference and I got an impression in my thoughts to tell my friend sitting next to me that I loved her. I had no idea she had just prayed for God to show her that he was there and that He loved her. It’s the Holy Spirit that can speak to our souls. Everyone here seems like they think God is a Gennie ready to grant their every wish. God is here for us and he does move in our lives. Take your focus off yourself and concentrate on the positive things in your life and strive after a daily relationship with the creator of everything. Read your bibles and fellowship with His children and be useful in his kingdom. He will speak to you in many different ways.
Ling says
Thanks for this inspiring message! I am a believer but my prayer hasn’t yet answered. I felt like God doesn’t about me or may be i am so sinful.anyway come to know even great men of God in history suffered and questioning God. Your message help me how to deal with my feelings.
Olivia Davis says
Thank you so much, Ling, for your comment, which is encouraging to me. I am so sorry that you are going through a period of feeling like the Lord isn’t answering your prayers-that’s a difficult place to be. I have prayed for the Lord to continue to help you process your thoughts and feelings and to meet you right where you are.
Michelle says
I love this! I’m in a period of silence currently and this is absolutely perfect and beautifully written . I love, love the examples you used of people crying unto the Lord. Sometimes I don’t ask questions or share what I am feeling with God, because I feel like it’s a question I shouldn’t ask. This helped me to see and understand that I can turn to him with every thought. Thank you so much!
Olivia Davis says
I am so happy to hear that this piece was helpful to you, Michelle! It is so encouraging that the Bible speaks to everything in our lives – even periods of silence! I am so glad that you are turning to Jesus with every thought. Thank you so much for your sweet comment. Many blessings, Michelle 🙂
Lucia says
I’ve been in a season of His silence for the first time in my walk. It rocked me. I googled “when God is silent” and this came up. I’m so thankful. It made me feel so much better knowing great men of God, whom God deeply loved went through the same and it has nothing to do with us being “too bad” or “not worth talking to”. (My parents left/disowned me, so I immediately went back to thinking Je would abandon me as well). Though I don’t understand why He is silent, I am no longer taking it personal. I’m considering His character; He has ALWAYS been very good to me and I am comforted by knowing I’m not alone in this. I am being honest with Him and not allowing the enemy to use my past to push me away from Him. Thank you so much for sharing these truths and examples online. It helped so much to get me back on track.
Olivia Davis says
Lucia, thank you so much for sharing this with us. I am so sorry that you are going through such a difficult season, but am encouraged that the Lord is helping you realize that he is with you, even – especially – here. I am so happy that you are being honest with the Lord, remembering that he is always good, and not giving the enemy any footing! I am praying for your continued peace and comfort and for the Lord to encourage you today in your walk with him 🙂
Vicki says
I loss my husband 1 month ago, I feel empty, sad, broken hearted, alone!! Ty for listening
Olivia Davis says
I am so sorry to hear that, Vicki. There are no words to adequately express my condolences for such a loss, but I can pray for you, so I will do that.
Dear Lord, you know Vicki, and you know everything about her. You know the pain that she is feeling. Please encourage her in a special way today that she knows is from you. Please show her the nearness of your presence. Help her to know that she is not alone – you are right here, in this moment, with her. Help her feel your love, Jesus. In Jesus’s name, Amen.